“Friends with benefits” is a term that has been around for some time now and with films of the same name and stars such as Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake starring within it, there’s no surprised that is became a bit of a phase…
Friends with benefits are basically friends that you don’t have a relationship with. Perhaps you had dated them once before while you were both in school, or you gave it a bash once years ago but found that you worked better as friends than as partners? They might be people that you would never see yourself being with in a loving, emotional sense. They could even be work colleagues that you don’t particularly like.
The only difference between these friends and your friend with benefits, is that you don’t have sex with the other friends. With your benefit friend, you do!
That’s the beauty of friends with benefits, you see. You could meet someone that you have amazing sex with, but don’t seem to be compatible with out of the bedroom, and you still get to keep them in your life. It’s just like NSA fun (no strings attached), it’s something that fulfils a purpose, not just because you want to feel warm and fuzzy in bed at night, spooning someone else to sleep.
The idea of it all is to not treat it as though it is a relationship because it isn’t. They don’t need to know where you are, what you’re doing, who you’re with, how many drinks you’ve had, and in the same breath, you don’t have a right to know where they are, what they’re doing, who they’re with, how many drinks they’ve had, etc. It’s easy – you get your life, they get theirs, and you get to have great sweaty, passionate, hair pulling, biting, scratching, pounding sex. The best kind – you can do what you like really because you don’t have to cook their breakfast the next day, see their faces without makeup, or wash skid marks out of their underpants on a Saturday afternoon.
Of course, the friends with benefits relationship isn’t something that suits everyone. Some girls can’t handle not having that much control over their male sexual partners. Some guys can’t handle the fact that they don’t know what their girl is up to on a Friday night. It’s something that only works for a small, select group of people, and if you’re the jealous type, it’s probably not the right kind of relationship for you.
There are a few things that you should know before you embark on this journey with a friend with benefits… For a start, these situations almost always end with one party getting feelings for the other party, and things ending in a horrible showdown. However, sometimes these love stories do work and do end in a marriage, babies and happy ever after. You might just end up being one of the lucky ones like our friend Dave who ended a friends with benefit situation with a handshake and a kiss on the cheek. There was no tears, no screaming, no upset… But that very rarely happens!
NSA dating = no strings attached dating. That’s literally what the name means, which should give the game away a little bit. No strings attached means no romance, no bullcrap, no fluff, no flowers or chocolates, hearts or kisses… It might seem a bit cold and calculated but for some people, it’s most definitely the way forward.
I don’t have time for a relationship!
There are so many men and women out there that simply don’t have the time to fit in a full-time relationship. Does this mean they should miss out on king nights in with multiple orgasms and chocolate body paint? Is it fair that they miss out on Saturday morning hungover sex after the night before. You don’t remember having sex the night before (yet) but you know it was good because your lips are still plumped and reddened, and you feel a slight ache between your legs. How is fair that someone should miss out on all this just because they are working seventy hours per week to become a lawyer?
My wife doesn’t understand me!
Oh come on – we’ve all heard that line. Some of you may even have used that line. It’s one that, although is a cliche, certainly does still work, and although frowned upon, is a classic example of NSA dating.
You definitely don’t want any strings attached when you are married looking for sex elsewhere. Maybe your wife hasn’t wanted to have sex since your last child was born… almost a year ago. Is she sick? Sad? Has she let herself go a bit? Are you lusting after some pretty little blonde thing like the girl you just hired to work in your office as your assistant? You don’t love your wife any less; you just need to get your rocks off somewhere. You certainly aren’t looking for someone to fall in love with. Just someone to screw from time to time when the mood takes you and you just so happen to be available at the same time.
I NEVER normally do this…
OK so this one is a line, but just like “my wife doesn’t understand me”, it’s another line that appears to work sadly. Girls, boys;when will you realise that THIS IS A LINE?
If you are finding yourself saying this, stop it. If you are stood in front of a handsome young man while your slightly balding husband is sat picking his nose on the couch, unzipping your skirt, stepping out of it, unclasping your bra… He already knows what kind of woman you are. You already know what kind of man he is. What’s the point in fluffing this up? You’re both looking for NSA dating fun… Why hide it?
There is nothing wrong with no strings attached dating, although it does have a certain stigma attached to it, and in most social circles, cheating on a partner or spouse is often not a great idea. Thankfully, you can find websites that will help you to find similar minded people online, and most dating websites will even have an “I am looking for..” box in which you can pick your preference. Most of the time you will find a “casual dating” or “NSA fun” box that you can check. Make sure that you check it!
Come on guys and gals – you didn’t expect to find information on foot fetishes without learning a few tips picked up by the professionals of the sport over the years. The average foot fetishist will have a preference of the type of foot they want to play around with, but when it comes to etiquette, the same rules apply to ALL!
There are plenty of men and women out there that openly admit to having a foot fetish. There are probably even more out there that just don’t admit to it. The fact of the matter is this – you are not alone. There are other’s out there. You are probably going to meet them. At least have the rules of doing it down to make it a pleasurable experience for both parties involved. As a result, loads of foot fetish web sites have cropped up, which cater for those with this wonderful fetish. One of the best is footfetishpartners.com, which has been around for years. It has numerous members – all of whom are looking for foot action. Check it out!
In the first flushes of romance…
There’s no need to delve right on in with the words “I have a foot fetish”. There are much more discreet ways of getting to the heart of the matter. Why not try having a play around with her feet? You could offer him or her a foot massage and see how they react. Feet are a bit like Marmite; you either love it or you hate it. If you hate it and someone grabs your feet to give them a massage, you are going to freak out a bit. You’ll see understand why we are advising you to do this – they’ll probably freak out if they are NOT a foot fetish person. You’ll learn whether or not you’re wasting your time.
Further down the line…
If you are going to want people to play with your feet, you need to at least keep them clean. At the same time, if you are going to spring a foot fetish on someone, be prepared for the fact that their feet may not be up to your usual standards. Feet are very often one of the most neglected places of the body so if you’re going to indulge, at least give some warning to keep the romance alive.
Don’t think it’s all about the feet…
If you’re dating a foot fetishist, don’t think that’s all they are about. They will enjoy and regularly want to partake in “regular” sexual acts too. They won’t just want to jerk off into your beautifully painted, stockinged feet all the time. That’s the thing that most people with a foot fetish find hardest, or so we’ve learned. Once they come out as having a specific sexual preference, it would appear people could focus on nothing else sexually.
Keepin’ them clean…
We’ve already mentioned keeping your feet clean but honestly keep them clean. If you want someone to enjoy your feet as part of their foreplay, you can’t expect them to enjoy a touch of Athlete’s foot, hairy toes and nail polish left over from a party three weeks ago. Make the effort to make them attractive and more people will find them attractive. It really is as simple as that!
Let’s be honest about this; casual dating is not easy. Men think it’s easy, and perhaps some women too, but the fact of the matter is it is much harder to have THAT conversation with someone than it is to find out whether or not you want to date someone long term! How are you seriously expected to turn around to someone and say, “Hi, my name is Dave, and I’m looking for casual dating. There’s a good chance I’m not going to put a ring on your finger…” Most girls will not appreciate that, at all.
This brings me nicely to our next point… the most important rules on casual dating that you’ll need to know before you embark on your journey!
As Billy Talent once said in the song, “Try honesty!” What’s the point in going through the hassle of making a girl believe she is the one for you, just so you can have a good time, only to break her heart a few months down the line when you realise that she is looking for just more than a casual fling, and you need to go through the whole nasty breakup thing?
What’s the point? Most girls, especially if they are in their late 20’s / early 30’s and aren’t married, probably won’t be looking for a short term, casual love-affair. These are girls that are looking for marriage, babies and the whole happily ever after thing that Disney films have lead them to believe is possible.
When you meet a girl on line or face to face, why not be honest upfront and let her know that you aren’t really looking for a relationship? Or even better still, make this very clear on your casual sex dating online dating profile. This is the thing about NSA fun – you can be a bit more risque… You’ll filter out the people that AREN’T right for this kind of relationship straight away, and potentially, you should be left with the ones that are going to fulfil your fantasies and get the job done, so to speak. You might not have time for a relationship but that doesn’t mean you need to miss out on all the fun that goes with it!
Don’t Lead Her On!
Right, as we’ve mentioned, girls of a certain age are looking for someone and that something is most definitely not a casual dating scenario. They aren’t looking to sow their wild oats like you guys are; they want to settle down and have babies. That’s the long and short of it. Even the girls that don’t think they want kids, WILL think about having kids, and once that biological clock starts ticking, nothing is going to stop them.
Don’t lead these girls on. There is no point at all in wasting your time and theirs. All you’re going to do is break her heart, and ask yourself this; do you really want a bunny boiler on your hands? When you’ve worked your way through as many women as you have, there’s a good chance that you are going to encounter at least one of these in your dating timeline. They are a pain in the ass. Don’t entertain the idea of trying to beat one. It won’t work.
If you don’t want a relationship and she does, don’t keep going along thinking one of you may change your mind. There’s a good chance it won’t happen and once again, you’ll be left with the awkward breakup that you would rather avoid. If she tells you she’s got feelings for you, tell her that’s not what you are looking for and step aside.
“Dirty dating” – what does this mean to you?
For some, dirty dating is something that shouldn’t be spoken of. Two people meeting up for sex, and sex alone, is just something that so many people cannot comprehend. Maybe it’s time for these people to start opening their minds? Dirty dating offers so much more than a cheeky bonk in a restaurant toilet, although we wouldn’t turn it down if it were put on a plate for us! 😉 I found this on a trip to South Africa….women (and men) say what they want and want what they say. No B.S. So a casual date or nsa sex is just what it is. Don’t you just love it when people are so honest?
There are a million and one scenarios that would lead to someone looking for a certain type of dating site. A dating site created for those looking for a bit of fun, a nice person to have a good evening with; perhaps not in a dating scenario, but definitely in a pants-own scenario. Dirty dating, NSA dating, no strings attached…. Is it really all that bad?
Let’s say you are a 30-something year old guy that has never been married or had kids because you were one hundred percent dedicated to your career. You don’t have time to be in a relationship with another person. It wouldn’t be fair on them OR you. You can’t give them the time they need because you work 75 hours per week and not ready to slow down at any point soon.
You need the touch of a woman’s fingers working her way down your groin, right? You want to feel the weight of a woman when she is straddling you, bouncing her way to making you climax. You want to experience knee-trembling kisses, and naughty nights in hotel rooms. Why should you give up on this just because you don’t have the time for a relationship? You could always go for prostitutes but honestly, who has time for that? And it’s hardly a nice thought is it? And the really classy ones are super expensive. Who has the money for a hobby like that?
What about the 20-something year old girls out there that are studying during the days, and working most nights and weekends too? Kelly, for example, wants to be a nurse. In order to survive in her two bedroom flat alongside her studies, she needs to work so she has a part time job in a call centre for a bank. She’s a very busy girl, especially when you consider she only has two nights per week spare to spend with friends and family. She works hard but she loves her life. She doesn’t have time for a full-time man in her life but she has needs, and there’s only so far a battery operated device will go.
What’s wrong with her meeting a nice young guy on a dirty dating website, letting him take her out for dinner, and then heading back to his for a night of hair-pulling, back-scratching, sweaty, passionate sex? He’s using a condom so she won’t catch a disease or get pregnant, and occasionally, she’ll call him up from time to time to repeat the evening. Who is she hurting? If you are in the UK, check out a no holds barred casual sex dates web site that I found called lookingforsex.co.uk. Great name huh? No need to use your imagination there then!
These two examples are the tip of the iceberg. Dirty dating sites attract a whole host of men and women, from married men whose wives won’t have sex with them, to girls looking for a way to boost their confidence after a particularly nasty breakup. Consenting adults lead their own lives and as you can imagine, all sorts of things could happen when the lights go out at the end of the date!
It might not be everyone’s cup of tea but dirty dating certainly serves a purpose. If it didn’t, it would exist, would it? Yes there are some really dirty people out there that spread diseases and have no respect for the partner they are with, but if you choose a good dating website and are smart about your dirty dating choices, and above all else, ALWAYS WEAR A CONDOM, what’s it gotta do with anyone else?
Foot fetish is one of the most common sexual fetishes out there, which makes it a tad odd that more people aren’t talking about it. To be fair, most of us are only just coming to terms with anal sex, so speaking about ejaculating over a pretty blonde’s feet isn’t hardly going to go down well in conversation… especially when so many people think that feet are weird, or ugly, or gross.
What happens however, when you come across someone that DOES have a foot fetish? Let’s say that you are a twenty-something girl that has met probably the hottest guy you’ve ever met. You’ve been on three absolutely amazing dates, you’ve clicked on a level you never thought possible, and last night, when you took him to bed, he made you climax harder than you’d ever climaxed before. He almost seems like the perfect guy. Could it be that he was too good to be true?
This morning, things took a change in direction. “I had a great night last night, thank you”, you say. “No worries babe, I had a great time too!”, he replies. Then, out of the blue, he comes out with “I think you have beautiful feet, you know. I quite like feet, especially your feet.” If this kind of situation excites you, then why bother going through the hassle of finding out if your beloved shares your passion for feet and check out foot fetish dating web sites – where everyone shares a passion for feet!
Just over the breakfast table, out of nowhere, on the morning after your third date with the most perfect man on the planet, he basically tells you he has a foot fetish. Now what do you do?
First things first; don’t panic.
These things happen. In this day and age, it is likely that you’ve probably come across your fair share of dating disasters in your time. Come on, we’ve all had the guy that sounded like Daffy Duck when they climaxed – “Oh my God!”. He shook his leg too. It was just weird. Or there was the guy that liked you to call him weird names while you were in the bedroom. Or the guy that liked it she you shoved a dildo up his ass, whilst tugging on his balls. People are becoming more sexually open these days. Porn online has lead to an increase of “weird” stuff, and sadly, it’s something you’re going to need to embrace.
Second – open your mind.
What’s so wrong about a foot fetish? Have you ever tried “feet-play”? If you haven’t how do you know you won’t like it? Rather than vetoing the idea straight away, do a bit of research. Even celebrities have foot fetishes. We all like different things in the bedroom. You like it when guys pull your hair, after all. Other girls would think that was weird.
Rather than saying no, have a look online. Watch some feet-related porn. Whilst doing this, be aware that even people with foot fetishes will think some of that porn is weird. Try the note “vanilla” foot-fetish stuff first.
Thirdly; why don’t you give it a go?
Come on, think about this; this guy is PERFECT for you. You are compatible in every other aspect of life so why not try to come to some sort of compromise with him over his sexual preferences? Have a chat with him about it and explain to him that it is something you’ve never really tried before, but you would be willing to learn more if he’ll be patient and let you go at your own pace? You never know, the two of you could have the best sex of your lives tonight… You won’t ever know unless you give it a try. What is it that you are scared of?
One in three marriages end in divorce these days. It’s a sad fact but a true one. Is it time to face facts, is marriage finished? Is it an outdated notion; one that is no longer relished by little girls dreaming of happy ever after’s and white dresses?
It seems as if people are giving up on the idea of marriage these days and, when you think about it, it makes sense for this to be the case. You need to put time and effort into a relationship and into a marriage, and if you don’t, it will crumble. Who has the time and effort to put into a marriage when they can barely manage to look after themselves each month? What 25-year old guy would want to be settled down with a kid these days when there is so much of the world left to travel, so many girls to meet, drinks to down, parties to gate-crash. On the other end of the spectrum, are girls really just looking for Mr. Right, bouncing from guy to guy in the hope that the perfect one will come along real soon?
We’d like to use a couple of our friends as an example here. Kim is 27 years old and going through a divorce (finally) after 4 years of marriage and a further 4 years of separation. They started off as a one night stand, which probably should have been a warning light right from the word go, but still they continued on their whirlwind romance. They were married within a year. As in love as they were, they both say that marriage destroyed their relationship. They were perfectly happy before they got married but as soon as that ring was on her finger, she was an utter nightmare, and he started screwing around. She had two affairs, looking for the love she wasn’t getting from her husband. He slept with everything under the sun because he didn’t find her sexually attractive anymore. Apparently, she had gotten fat.
Another couple, Kate and Dan, aren’t together at all. They started casually sleeping together three years ago. They have never once said they were a couple, but hither of them now sleep with anyone else. They have an “open” relationship which means at first they were sleeping with other people, but after about eight months or so, they sorta stopped and only screwed each other. They are perfectly happy. They rarely fight. They have their own lives. They don’t put a label on their relationship. They are friends with benefits.
No strings attached relationships seem to be all the rage now, whether you are in a relationship, married or single. It seems that this works better than the traditional type of relationship and when you think about, it makes sense because we no longer live in a transitional kinda world. We have busy working schedules, some of us juggling two or three jobs, or even seventy hour weeks. We have places around the world to travel and lives to enjoy. We work hard and we play hard… It seems only right that we wouldn’t want to settle down, and if we did, we want to explore outside the box in the sense of no strings dating, or affair dating.
It’s funny how the unconventional relationships seem to have a better time of things that those relationships that follow the traditional route. Could it be that marriage really was finished, with NSA fun and affair dating becoming all the rage? Who knows… As we’ve said though; one in three marriages end in divorce.
Dogging is something that is still considered as a taboo subject in the UK, despite the fact that more and more people are now deciding to partake in the activity. I’m a 20-something girl that has never dogged before, and as part of the research into this unbiased view, I asked around a few of my friends that openly admit to screwing around in public, and was also invited along to enjoy the ride myself.
Of course, this is a decision not to be taken lightly… I am about to watch people have sex in a random car park. I full expected it to be seedy, disgusting, and I thought I’d see a lot more in the way of body fluids than I did. Sadly, and probably disappointingly for you guys, I didn’t join in, simply because I was too scared… I’m still a rookie after all! 😉
One of the first things that I noticed about the local dogging community in that “meeting spot” was the fact that everyone was delightfully friendly. At no point did the seedy fifty-year old guy in a string vest come over to me and ask if he could ejaculate on my chest. I always thought this would happen if I ever went dogging. I was almost disappointed! Lol!
I always assumed that greasy, seedy guys would try to force me to do things I didn’t want to do. This again, was something that didn’t happen. Although there were things going on that I probably wouldn’t have tried in the relative comfort of my own bedroom, let alone in such a public setting as a street-light-lit car park, a little out of the way from the busy roads, at no point did I feel as if I had to join in. I actually found just watching quite an interesting event and when I went home later on that evening, although I didn’t suggest to my partner where I had been, he certainly noticed a change in how wet I was when I slid right into bed next to him.
That’s the thing about dogging – it’s not quite what public perception would lead us to believe. We have all indulged in a little voyeurism from time to time whether it’s bonking on the balcony in your 20’s with the guy so fit, you couldn’t hold a serious conversation going with him. What about the time that you accidentally masturbated in the living room with the curtains open because the mood took you. Someone could have seen as they were walking past your window. The people in the houses opposite probably would have seen if they happened to be glancing out of their upper-floor windows. You didn’t care. In fact, the idea of it made it all the more horny for you. What’s the difference between that, and having sex with your partner while people watch?
At the end of the day, what works for one person in the bedroom won’t always work for someone else, but I strongly believe you can’t have an opinion about something unless you have actually tried it for yourself. I’m not suggesting that you go out and screw your partner in the first car park you happen to find. That’s illegal for a start, and you don’t want someone to call the cops on you because you are giving them a show they don’t particularly want to watch. But what’s the harm in going along for the ride? If you don’t like it, you don’t need to do it again! I’m not sure whether or not I’d actually partake in dogging myself, but watching other people writhing around in ecstasy around me certainly proved to be a massive turn on. Even if I didn’t know where to put my eyes!
Bondage is hardly the topic of conversation to bring up on a first date, but three dates in it certainly makes a difference when you are stood in your under crackers, whip in hand, boner standing to erection, doesn’t it? It makes sense to get these things out the way nice and early. You don’t want to waste your time with someone that doesn’t have the same sexual preferences as you. What would be the point? You wouldn’t end up marrying someone you weren’t having fabulous sex with… would you?
One of the easiest places to meet new potential bondage dates is on the internet. There’s also the element of the unknown when you are not sat face to face, having a conversation with someone. In turn this means that you will have a tendency to be a bit braver than you would be in “real life”… which could lead to some interesting conversations indeed!
Of course, joining a bondage-dating specific website is a great idea if you want to come out with it straight away. At least in doing this, all cards are on the table right from the start. You can hardly have “crossed wires” about your sexual preferences when you meet on a bondage dating website, can you?
As much as we’d love to tell you a whole range of pick-up lines that you can use on dating websites to pick up potential sub missives or dominants, we’re not. In fact, you should steer well clear of these. A chat up line isn’t going to work for you. The people on these websites are not small-fry. These are the big guys – the “Christian Grey’s” of the bondage world. Do you really think “Get your coat, you’ve pulled” is going to cut it here? We really hope you don’t think that!
Ideally, you’re going to know what you want before you relive into this world. Once you’ve dipped your toes into the water, that’s it. There is no going back. You’ll start to like things that you never even thought existed. One day you’ll be innocently tying your partner up one evening and two months later, you are poking your girlfriend’s pinkie finger don your Jap’s eye. It happens – trust ys! It happens more often than you’d think.
If you don’t know what you want, have an idea of what kind of direction you want to go in next. Are you looking for someone to tie you up so that you can get a feel for what it feels like? Do you want to try spanking your other half but want to see how good it can feel for yourself beforehand to learn more about it? Whatever your reason for wanting to try your hand at successful bondage dating, you need to have some sort of strategy. You might not know what you want, but you do need to at least have a plan. Don’t know where to start? The internet is your best place to start. It might be time to start looking at YouPorn! 😉
Alternative dating is a relatively new concept and one that very few people have heard about. The thing about alternative dating is that it provides the perfect solution for those looking for a little something special… It’s called alternative for a reason!
You may have tried speed dating and got nowhere, you may have tried the “regular” and conventional online dating services available online but found that you had no luck. Why not try your hand at alternative dating?
The alternative dating website is basically one that doesn’t fit into an already existing niche. These are more specialist websites for more specialist people. For example, a heavily tattooed and pierced person may not got the most messages from a “regular” dating website, but on an alternative dating website dedicated to heavily body-modded people, the odds stack more in your favour. It just makes sense, doesn’t it?
So, let’s take a look at “alternative” dating…
Let’s say you’re a nudist. That’s not the type of thing that you can put on your average dating profile, is it?
“Hi, yes, my name is Dave and I like to be naked… all the time”
Firstly, how would you expect someone to respond to that if it’s not something they understand, and secondly, how many people do you think are out there that are actually comfortable with their own nudity? To be honest, for most people, it sounds like hell.
You’ll have much more luck with an alternative dating website. You’re going to be more likely to meet someone that enjoys your need when you go looking for someone on a website dedicated to it.
What about if you are the heavily tattooed guy that we spoke about earlier on? It just makes completely perfect sense for him to go on a tattooed alternative dating website to find his new love interest because he will have a better chance of finding someone with the same interests as him.
There are a whole host of alternative dating websites you can turn to – there are those dedicated to finding love while being an animal lover (not in THAT way), websites for shy people, nudist dating sites, vegetarians, music lovers, film buffs, and many more! You’re not going to want to go for dinner with someone, order a vegetarian dish and then watch your date devour their way through a massive steak. It just makes perfect sense to find someone with the same interests and tastes as you, whether it is with food, music, sex, or more.
You will have more luck in love when you find someone who at least one thing in common with you. Although opposites attract, you will need to have some matching interests otherwise you’ll have nothing to argue about, and with sex especially, it actually has the power to destroy a perfectly good relationship if needs aren’t met… Now do you see what we mean by the term “alternative dating”?